high blood sugar rant

here i am, at 355 mg/dL, waiting until i can go on a run. i was ready to run about 25 minutes ago, but it’s looking like my body has different plans.

i’ve been struggling with erratic blood glucose readings for the best few days, due to scar tissue build up around my most common pump site areas. the absorption isn’t as good there now because of how often i use those sites (my favorite sites are arm sites.) also, there have been multiple issues with one of my prescriptions lately, and it is impacting my levels significantly.

i am mad.

we have plans at 7. i could’ve been almost back and showered by now. if i run with a BG this high, i risk vomiting, passing out, and a coma. if i miss my run today, i will be crushed. i have goals. but my t1 always tries to take them away from me.

normally i would say “screw you t1, i’m running.” but it’s different when my life is on the line. i want to be motivated and determined, but i don’t want to be stupid.

today is one of the days when i crave normalcy. i miss my freedom that i had prior to diagnosis. being diagnosed at age 20 means that i had 2 decades of “normal”…2 decades that i remember well. i know life another way; i don’t get to have that other way anymore, and the worst part is that it’s not due to an mistake i made. it’s because of my genes. because that’s fair, right?

not every day is good, but there is good in every day.

i’m mad, yes, but once my BG lets me be rational again, i will try not to be so hard on myself.

Update at 22:46

my BG came down enough for me to run. i had my best 5k time of the week. i have been battling lows now all evening, but it’s mainly all good now. thanks for your love, prayers, & just for listening. t1 is relentless, unpredictable, & frustrating. but i am so thankful to be a determined girl who constantly tries to prove t1 wrong. couldn’t fight this disease without my strong support system &, most importantly, my God. 

my passion for creating

spring is…HERE! the sun is shining, the birds are chirping, and the flowers are blooming.

yesterday, Bri & I had a great time walking and hiking around this town before our move in a month. as we were walking back to the house, i noticed our CHRISTMAS WREATH was still up. on March 21! no thanks. so, i had to rectify the situation. i drove down the hill to Hobby Lobby {i was going anyways for supplies to craft my future sister-in-law’s shower} and i purchased everything i would need to create a spring/summer floral wreath.

i didn’t know how to make one, but i purchased the materials i thought i would need, and i got to work. i am really happy with how they turned out! the blue flower is a peony, and the yellow one is {obviously} a sunflower. i love how these wreaths brighten up our porch.

i really have a passion for creating, and i always have. whether it’s art, music, knitting, lessons for my kids, baking, etc. i love the feeling of having a vision, and making it happen. i love using my head and hands in tandem to create something that myself or someone else can use & enjoy. i especially love when it involves flowers. 🙂

that being said, i miss creating and have decided that, after i officially leave my job on April 17th {*sobs*}, i will take up painting and creating once again. with the encouragement of my sister and the rest of my family, i will be rebooting my Etsy shop!

i personally love scoring cute home decor that doesn’t cost an arm and a leg, so my goal is to make super affordable yet beautiful pieces that people can enjoy in their homes. i will keep y’all in the loop after April 17th!

until then, i will be taking requests for wreaths! they will be $30 + shipping. it costs about $27 in materials to create one, plus the extra $3 for my time…it’s valuable, people! 😉 i am hoping to get the price of a wreath down to $20, so i am researching the cheapest way to get quality materials. just let me know what color you want your letter/focus flower to be, and you’ve got it.

this day has been a wonderful day of creating some new spring eye candy for our home! i know we will be packing up & heading out soon, but i like to make our home feel homey, even if it is only for a few more weeks. the photos below are today’s projects.

hope y’all are embracing spring as well!
xo

audge

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just my luck…

this is not profound {or really worth your time.} it’s just a silly snippet of my life this week! I’m human. living with type 1 diabetes. enjoy. 

this week {st paddy’s} is all about luck. well, let me share with you some of the good ol’ Audge luck. 🙂

sunday morning I wake up with a headache & nausea…side effect of restarting my meds {that I had to go without for two weeks due to miscommunications with my Endo & pharmacy.} I crawl back into bed to sleep it off. 

an hour later, I am awakened by my husband telling me to check my blood glucose level because he said I looked in distress. sure enough, my BG was 46. so, not good. {normal range is 90-120.} hello, hypoglycemia.👋

all we had on the nightstand was a laffy taffy, so I began munching on that as he retrieved a juice box from the kitchen. suddenly, I bit down on something that oddly resembled concrete. 

MY DENTAL CROWN. 

the crown on my tooth came off. during a low. the crown that I received from a root canal due to an abscessed tooth that occurred as a warning sign of my not-yet-diagnosed type 1 diabetes. THAT is my luck. 🙂

this kind of stuff always happens to me, but I’m not mad about it. I have learned that how you overcome frustrating situations is often by learning to laugh about it. 

so, there I was, “tooth” in hand, shaking & delirious from my low, just cracking up. of course I was pissed later. but in the moment? hilarity. 

“just my luck” is not a negative phrase for me. I’ve always been a bit of a mess, but it makes my life interesting, so I embrace it. 

in case you needed a laugh or to hear a humbling moment on a Wednesday, there ya go.